Ah yes, the meaning of Christmas. I look at it this way: The birth of Jesus was God coming after us. For me, it was like this: 

There was the first half of my life, the ordinary American variety, normal as it was, when everything still felt strangely…unmoored. I woke, walked, got into trouble the standard amount, worked, talked, laughed, and lived—but there was a hollowness beneath it all. Not dramatic. Not desperate. Just…thinner than I had expected. Life lacked a center of reference, and I felt that loss. The more innocent days of early childhood weren’t the issue so much, but the adult days increasingly were.

The Book of Ecclesiastes puts words to that feeling better than I can: “Meaningless, meaningless… all is meaningless under the sun” (Eccl. 1:2). Not that life itself is meaningless, mind you, but that life lived only under the sun—measured by man’s success, progress, or appearance—cannot bear the weight of the soul. Only God can do that. Nevertheless, I tried to fill the subtle ache of meaninglessness with activity, distraction, and being important in the eyes of others. I tried to outrun the disquiet, you might say. But it follows you if you live in it long enough—thirty-six years in my case. Until one day, I realized what I had become: a lost ball in the high grass. So I called to Him.

A.W. Tozer wrote a classic book, The Pursuit of God. His great insight is this: while we often speak of our pursuit of God, the deeper reality is that God first pursues us. Our seeking is always a response to His prior coming after us.

There I was, a lost ball, thirty-six years young, unable to solve my condition no matter which way I turned. What happened next was nothing short of an act of grace—the culmination of a pursuit, with me as the one pursued. For Christ didn’t shout for me to come out from my hiding. He walked into the high grass after me. There’s pure grace in that.

So, the Father sent His Son in after me. I responded. And that is how I found my way.

Merry Christmas.

I hope this encourages you this Christmas season to thank God for coming after you.

Kevin Murray
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